February 1st, 2006

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[ MY GIRLIES ]

It was plain stupid. Ironic. And pathetic.

I found my self sitting in a club with a couple of my girlies, moping about my broken heart. 3 months too late. Good thing I'm not talking about my period here, cause that would've just been wacked up.

I gulped down another shot of vodka. It tasted good, the whole way down my throat. The burn didn't matter, I'd soon be too drunk to feel anything, to remember anything. Well that was my attempt at least. It was such a sad situation; here I was, a highschool sophomore, long hair, brown eyes, supposedly mature, getting depressed over her first break-up.

I was fine the first few weeks, I went on with my life, he went on with his. No pain.

But it quickly went down hill on the second month. I started to get confused, angry, I didn't understand why he did it. And the fact that some said it was because he liked another bitch didn't help either. Sorry 'bout the language, I still get worked up just thinking about it.

Shit. I felt a tear roll down my cheek. I wiped it away with a violent brush of my arm, before the lasers went on again at this side so that everyone could see.

The fact that he had all this control over me, ticked me off. Making me feel shitty all over again, like I needed his help for that. Just his name brought pain, and everytime I saw him in the hallways, it was just unaviodable. I regret everything now, but it's a little too late. An extra...7 months too late.

7 months ago. That was when it started. I can't quite pinpoint the day we got together. Perhaps we never did, but somehow, we had become an 'item'. It didn't seem like there could be a bad ending for me in the beginning.

It wasn't as if I had fallen head-over-heels for this guy. Sure, I had liked him, but it wasn't anything serious, we all crush. I wish I could say the same now, but it just wasn't possible.

I wanted to be in his arms again. I wanted to be able to be in his warmth, be able to breathe his scent. But it was useless now. More pathetic than useless actually. I had told myself that I could never stoop so low, to NEED him. But here I was, in need of him.

I didn't understand how he had become so important to me. I didn't LOVE him, at least I wasn't aware of it. Come on, I couldn't even remember how we got together, it wasn't much of an, I wanted him, he wanted me, situation. But, somehow, I screwed myself over by getting myself into this.

I'm using too much 'but's', it's all useless now. It's not like I could turn back time, to when he still didn't mean anything to me. When I wasn't feeling all useless, pathetic, and broken.

"Yo, Reese...*hick* hehehe...'scuse me..hehe..Reeeeese...!"

Whoops, forgot about introductions. My full name is Teresa Lee, and my parents call me Lee Hae Min, whereas my friends call me Reese. I no longer have recollecion of how I got that nickname, but it stuck. Not that i'm complaining, I like it. I always thought that girls that had guy names were sexy, powerful, dominating, and most importantly, sexy. And it's not the alcohol talking, so don't laugh, 'cause if I ever found out who you were, you'd get my grey and pink Converses up your arse. Not funny.

Samantha, whom we call by the name Sam, fell into the seat next to me. Yes, she's the drunk one that tried to get my attention. I envied her friggin' straight, jet black hair, her big almond eyes and long face, she was so damn.....sexy. HAHA, okay, maybe the alcohol was starting to kick in. Oh, well. That's what I came here for anyways.

Using the cushioned seats for support, she pushed herself up-right again, and faced me. As she grabbed my shoulders, her head lost balance and leaned to mine, forehead to forehead. She began to shake me with her hands.

"*Hick*...Reeese...wake upppp...haha you sleepy--*hick*...sleepy......woman. Waaaake upp!!"

"Sam, I'm wide awake." I laughed as I gently removed her hands off my shoulders.

"Oh..heheh...MORNING, SUNSHINE! Heyy...where did everyone go...? OH. MY. GOSH. *hick* WHERE AM I, Reese??"

Just then, the rest of my girls returned, pushing through the crowds.

"C'mon Reese, come dance! The bastard isn't worth moping around for! We came for fun right??"

That was Ferica, she was my closest girl, we had each other's back, good times or rough scenes. She hated her name, so we 'renamed' her Erica, that made her happy. She was a pretty crazy girl at times, but her laid-back, attractive looks made her look like those timid flirty girls, without the sluttiness though. I would have to say that she was prettiest out of ALL the girls in Korea, inside AND out, but Eric differs. Now don't get confused, Ferica is Erica, and Erica is Eric. I gave her that name, for reasons that you should already remember.

"Haha, c'mon, girl. Get up. Let's go feel up them sexy boys out there, HAHA. I know you like them young ones, I think I might've ran across some niners!"

That made me laugh. Luna was the craziest out of all of us. Oddly, she was also the oldest, so we renamed her 'Nuna', she always scolded us for calling her that, but you could tell that on the inside, she liked the power and authority. Nuts, I tells ya. If you didn't know her, you wouldn't have seen her crazy side. She looked older than us, more sophisticated, less...crazy, which she was 100%, though. But it was also her craziness that brought the laughter at all the wrong times, making them the best times. She knew just what to do at sad and awkward times.

"Oh my goodness, I can't believe you just said that, unnie, that was just...wrong."

HAHA. That one made me laugh too. She's Ibellina. Pronounced 'EYE BEH LEE NAH'. Even her name could tell you what kind of person she was. See how important names are?! Ibellina's the most 'innocent' one out of the 5 of us, shy and quiet. But she was friggin' SMART. Academically SMART, but...not so much STREET smart. And she looks waaay too young and innocent to be hanging out with people like me and Luna, but she somehow got sucked into the crew. I'm not complaining 'bout that either, Ibellina pretty much completed my girlies crew.

As for her nickname, we called her Toby. Yes, I know that it doesn't quite move smoothly from IBELLINA. But come on, IBELLINA. Who are we  kidding here? Can you think of a name that sorta relates to it? Didn't think so. ANYWAYS, her first night out with us, was to watch Spiderman, hence the name TOBY. For the slow people, the actor that plays Spiderman is named Toby something. HAHA, not my fault that he wasn't good enough to deserve me rmembering his name. But Toby completed our group just like how Spiderman completed Marvel. Probably not the same way, but whatever, as long as you get the gist of it.

But of course, tonight was a girls' night out. So the guys weren't here, there has to be guys to complete every crew, right? And since it was a girls' night out, we didn't let the guys come, they pleaded and begged, but Ferica put her foot down. And she has a big foot. But don't tell her that you heard it from me, or you'll be seeing grey and pink, coming to asses near you. But don't you worry, you'll meet the guys soon, it's just a matter of time. I promise that you'll ADORE them.

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